Ramblings of a Nomad

My original intent was to write a note letting you all know that I'm not writing a post yet. Indeed, this still is my aim, to point you to the forthcoming post(s). However, as I write, I'm aware that I have an itch to scratch, on my brain somewhere, and I think writing will help. I'm afraid you are all about to fall prey to the ramblings of a nomad.

This nomad is not the kind who lives in tents and herds sheep somewhere in the Middle East (forgive me if anything I write at this hour is politically incorrect). This nomad is a 19-year-old girl, a Filipino born in Australia, living in Canada, though never at home for more than 3 weeks at a time. I seem to spend most of my life packing suitcases and preparing for the next take-off.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at all. I love to travel. I love seeing new places and meeting new friends. I love fresh experiences, and growing from them, whether good or bad.

(Now, I can easily say most of that in retrospect. A lot of times when I experience something new, I stress and get worried about everything my imagination can conjure up, and bad experiences are never fun while they're happening. Thankfully, God is teaching me through experience that I can trust Him with every single thing.)

I will leave the details of my recent adventures for future posts. For now, on a more serious note...

Sometimes, I get weary of my nomadic life. Sometimes I wish I could just settle down in one place for a decade or so, and skip all the hopping from place to place, living out of two now very familiar suitcases, trying to drag (or decide whether or not to drag) my violin all around the world, and avoid the pressure of keeping up with transportation schedules. Sometimes I wish I could just stay in an English-speaking country and not have to deal with the confusion and frustration of not being able to communicate, or the risk and embarrassment of trying and saying something weird. Sometimes I wish I didn't have to learn how to act and react in a different culture. Sometimes I wish I could just see and pay for everything in Canadian dollars. Sometimes I wish I knew what the next 5 years' plan for my life is, set in stone. Sometimes I wish I could just have a 'normal' life.

Sometimes.

At other times, or most times, I would not trade this life for any other. My life has been full of unexpected turns and hills, of bright moments and dark moments, of times when God threw doors open wide and times when He closed doors in my face, but He has never failed me. He has been constantly present at my side, guiding me, helping me, comforting me, teaching me, loving me. Looking back at my "solo times" with God in the various places where my travels have taken me, I see a special string of unforgettable moments in communion with Him.

They were mountain-top experiences...

...and often quite literally.

I would not trade these for the world. And looking back, every place where God has led me has proved (or surely will prove) to be an invaluable step in my life.

Though tired of hopping, I gain strength from hopping.

I will cling to the lessons I'm learning from the stories of Abraham, Issac, Jacob, and Joseph. They were nomads too.

Whenever God calls, I will go, even if I don't know where I am going.
I will trust even my very life's blood to the One who never fails to keep His promises.
Though the future is unknown, and past sins and failures are enough to make me weep at the feet of Jesus, I will surely struggle with that Angel and prevail, never relinquishing my desire for the promised blessing.
Even if I found myself thrown into a pit, dragged off as a slave to a foreign land, cast into prison in spite of my innocence...

God is faithful, and I choose to remain faithful

to the end,

knowing that it is His power working in me which actualizes the results of that choice.

If the reason I'm a nomad is because it is fulfilling God's purposes, then I am perfectly content. I can trust Him with my life and with every step.

Because He leadeth me.

Letter from a Faraway Friend

I started writing this in an email, but soon decided I wanted to share it here. It's a letter to my class, but I pray you will find a blessing in it too.

__________________________________________

Dear Class Family,

I just realized that I haven't talked to bunches of you all in a long time. And bunches of us haven't talked to other bunches of us in a long time. This is not good...but we can make it better! 

Just an update from my side...

I've been here in Germany for an internship with Amazing Facts Europe since April. They started the first AFCOE-Europe here then too, and it's been going well and God has blessed. It's been quite the experience working here while these two organizations are in "creation" phase. I've learned so much, about working in a multicultural setting, starting ministries, and living with all sorts of different people. It's really a blessing and privilege to be here. Personally, I've been able to learn some German, and I've had the opportunity to learn new things like social media, photography (anyone want to sponsor my new interest? lol), coordinating church services, and planning trips around a bit of Europe by myself (which would be much more fun if one of YOU could join me! Anyone want to come over in August?). 

Spiritually, I've learned so much and grown a lot. But I think I can sum it up in a few words:

My identity is not in what I do. Even if it is God's purpose and calling for my life, I should not -- no, cannot -- define or identify myself by what I do. My identity is not who I am, but who God is. Who is God? God is love. Thus, my identity is a covenantal, marriage relationship with God -- "Till death do we part"; and my purpose is to be a disciple of Christ, doing what a disciple of Christ does--making disciples. The way to make disciples is to love, because of my identity. Because God is love.

We can never dwell on that thought too much. "God is love" seems so simple, but I think we make life, and much more our spiritual life, too complicated. It's human. I am very much human, I've realized a lot in the past year. But God is very much God, and He is merciful and patient...by His grace working in me, I can live and love and lead more like Jesus every day. Only by His grace!

Life gets busy, distances expand, and time grows old. But once upon a time, in a land far away, between the mountains, across the river, where little people pick up orange orbs from the ground, a group of those little people once lived together. Prayed together. Laughed together. Cried together. That year was a milestone in our lives -- and I also believe it was in our spiritual lives as well. 

So, I want to appeal to you: Remember your identity in Christ. I know we each discovered our identity in a deep way that year, and I believe God has taught us each more since then. But it's easy to forget. I don't know what it will take to remember, but I encourage you, take some solo time, like the time we had in Kauai our last Sabbath there, and ask God to help you remember your identity in Christ. In the past two years, life has thrown trials at me like a whirlwind, and all I could do was cling to God and my God-given identity. I have a feeling it's been similar for you. Remember your God-given identity, and cling to it. Because God is clinging to you.

Perhaps I'm the only one who misses you all so much right now. But I don't really think so. Someday very soon, we will have a real family reunion. Not in Kauai, not in Europe, not at Fountainview, but in the land that is fairer than day -- with Jesus, who has kept us faithfully.

Since that day we marched with purple and black.

To the Class of Twenty Eleven.

With love in Christ,

A Faraway Friend

Sorry, I couldn't resist :)

It Doesn't Seem Quite Right to Say Goodbye: Part 2

Here is the update for the last Sabbath and also pictures from the entire trip. I didn't write a play by play, so I'll have to make one up...

Feb 16, 2013 - Iloco Sur Trip: Day 10

Can't believe it's the last day already. 

The students are put on a special newscast for Sabbath School. It's hard to understand their English (and the sound system isn't that great), so I'm not exactly sure what it is about. I think it has to do with a mission focus. Today is the hottest yet.

A quick lunch, and then get ready for the baptisms. We have to go down the mountain to the river.

Phew, what an awesome ride on the motorbike with one of the pastors! We were late to catch the jeepney. Rode in skirt and all.

I'm always touched to see young people give their lives to God and signify their commitment through baptism. I remember that one of the boys responded to one of my appeals this week (in the message about the cross and God's love), and very enthusiastically too when not many other students did. Praise the Lord!

Another ride up the mountain. Now we have an afternoon program put on by the Angel Force, with a small appreciation ceremony for the pastors and I and the tech guy we brought along. 

(NOTE: Many of the pictures below were not taken by me, but by the tech guy. I was so busy during the week preparing sermons, as I have described in previous posts, so he was able to get more pictures when I wasn't even around. He also doesn't prefer his name to be used online for some reason, which I think is kind of funny. Oh well.)

After the program I played my violin for some of the students. They had only heard me play improvised hymns all week. They got really excited over the fiddle songs.

Another quick meal, and Social Night starts soon. They want me to play three songs: Canon in D and some fiddle songs. Not sure what else will go on other than games and such.

Just participated in one of the games, which was fun. Interesting though, because even though I only graduated 2 years ago, I am 4 years ahead of these kids, since their high school is grade 7-10. 

Wow some of the village kids put on a cultural dance, and they are really good! I was watching the boys bang the dongy things, and it takes certain hand technique and skill to get them to make the different sounds. Later the big kids did some cultural dances, but they weren't near as good. 

Just got pulled into the cultural dance! In their culture, if they give you one of the blankets used in dancing, you have to join the dance. Haha I haven't done a Filipino cultural dance since I was little. The kids got a kick out of it. They said I was good though. Must be in my blood I guess.

Now it's the marching. I've been warned about this, so I'll just stay put...too many guys were crushing on me all week (which was quite annoying. Someone said I resemble Jessica Sanchez. Ugh). This would be Adventist or "veggie" dancing as someone called it.. You go in pairs, boy and girl, and "march." Ate Marlin, the principal, leads with the whistle. 

Haha, Pastor Imai is with one of the girls, he is so funny! He also joined the cultural dances earlier, and boy was that a hoot. What a cool guy. Did I tell you yet that he is a Hiroshima survivor? The only one in his class. He was 6 years old, and not a Christian yet. But he knows God saved him because he had a plan for him. He is a retired pastor, but now his wife is working as a nurse. 73 and doing the work of 5 nurses! It is because of her work and his senior pension that he can afford to go on mission trips to preach and build churches, all on his own money. He and Pastor Panghulan started the "NIPPI Caring Foundation" which helps underprivileged students go to school etc.

There were some songs, and now the end. Ate Marlin is giving her last speech, and we will too.

They gave us each an Angel Force album. During my farewell speech I played this song by Melissa Otto, See You When We Get There for the students. It pretty much sums up everything, and it definitely encapsulated our feelings on that last night. I will never forget these people, this place, or this experience.

It doesn’t seem quite right

To say goodbye my friend

But there’s a work to be done

To tell the world that He is love

If I don’t see you here again

My brother

I’ll see you when we get there

God’s great mercy be forever with you

Courage, courage until we get there

We are here for just a little while

My sister God surely gives beautiful gifts

You are dear to my heart 

Reminding me of His caring love

Fellow pilgrim 

We’ll still be taking the same way home

Even though oceans apart

We’ll still be fighting the same fight together

If I don’t see you here again

My sister

I’ll see you when we get there

God’s great mercy be forever with you

Courage, courage until we get there

We are here for just a little while

For the blessed hope we have

Has to be known by all our family

So our Father can finally take us home

I’ll be praying for you

That He will hold and keep you through

Until He comes and He is coming soon

Brother, Sister

I’ll see you when we get there

God’s great mercy be forever with you

Courage, courage until we get there

We are here for just a little while

We are here for just a little while

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My room at our stopover at an Adventist College on the way to Concepcion.

 Out in the middle of nowhere...

Tricycle got stuck while crossing the river 

 Welcome to G. Del Pilar, Iloco Sur

Windy, bumpy road. This part has concrete at least

Greeted by part of the marching band on our way up the driveway 

Angel Force sings to welcome us

 Guest rooms, where some of the girls live. My room is the second door.

My humble abode for the week


Boys' dorm, I think

The fairly new church building

Library and school building 

 I think this is the kitchen.

 Pastor Imai preaching and Pastor Panghulan translating

My first Jeepney ride (that I can actually remember). Rode every single day to the evening meetings (except for once on a motorbike with one of the pastors)

 The students sit in columns, not rows

A view inside one of the offices

Very long, very high, not so scary at night when you can't see anything...I never tried it during the day

This is where we had the evening meetings 

It's an outdoor hall

The basketball court, stage, and mountains in the background 

The library. I didn't even get to see this. 

This driveway is verrrrryyyyy steeep 

No explanation necessary

 Panorama of the campus from the stage

Side view of the guest rooms

 My bathroom. What a cultural experience. To flush, you pour water in the toilet with the bucket, which is about 1.5' high. To bathe, you pour water on yourself. It's soooo cold! Many houses are like this in the Philippines, except that they would have tile covering the floors and walls and a divider between the toilet and bathing area.

A picture one of the grade 7 students drew, copying the background streamer on the stage

On Friday morning they put on a small show for us. This is the marching band. Pretty impressive. 

 Shot taken at the last week of prayer meeting

Praise the Lord for these seven girls who responded to the appeal to give their lives fully to God and follow His plan for them, knowing that He needs them to finish the Story! 

After every afternoon meeting we broke into groups to pray. Notice how they hold hands around the circle by crossing arms. One of the few "CAA" things that make it special. 

"WE NEED YOUR HELP" Most of the students are not well off, and the teachers only get paid about 3000 PhP (about $75) per month. They do it to serve the Lord. If you would like to help, contact me and I can put you in touch with Pastor Panghulan.

Riding the motorbike in a skirt. Fun!

Baptisms at the river on Sabbath. Praise God for 15 souls, mostly students and three kids. A group of the students are not Adventist. But that group has now shrunk by one!

Only in the Philippines.... 

Certificates of appreciation


Angel Force, the full group of 4 official members and 11 trainees

 Pastor Imai brought boxes of clothes for the students and staff

Kids doing a cultural dance at Social Night on the last Saturday night. They were really good, especially the younger kids!


Last goodbye at Candon...

It doesn't seem quite right to say goodbye, my friend...

A Running Play-By-Play

I have decided to try something I tried when we went to Hawaii with Fountainview. At random moments throughout the day, I will write a short update of what is currently happening, and when it is compiled I will post it for you all to see! It is like a running journal, a play-by-play of my trip here, each day. I will try to leave it as unedited as possible so you can get a feel for the moment as it was, unless there is anything too sensitive or personal to share in public.

I've tried in vain to upload pictures, so they will either have to wait, or you can check out: instagram.com/vjac47 I think to see pictures. For some reason that works sometimes for me, depending where I am.

Enjoy! And praise the Lord for this experience....


Feb 8, 2013 - Iloco Sur Trip: Day 2

9:46 am - Driving in the second van of our trip on our way to Concepcion Adventist Academy. After we picked up Pastor Imai in Manila last night at midnight, we drove another 4 hours. We stayed for the night (4 am-9:15 am) at Northern Luzon Adventist College.

2:02 pm - Just finished lunch at Chow King. Now we have switched vehicles into a rather dusty, rickety van. The door doesn't close, and we are going up on a treacherous road in the mountains with a deep ravine. "It's roller coaster time," says Pastor Jorge. Now we are getting ice cream.

2:34 pm - We are now on the bumpy road. It comes in patches though. Back on the pavement. I wish I had worn shorts.
And now on the bumpy again.

3:05 pm - We've crossed the river 4 times now...back and forth. Now for the final up I think. Soooo bumpy I feel like my vertebrae are going to fall out of my spine...

4:33 pm - We arrived probably almost an hour ago. Luckily I was taking a video of the super steep driveway, because when we reached the top a glockenspiel/drum band was playing on either side of the road! (Just what Val needs to be happy). They were really good. The principal, Ate Marlin, said there are more than 40, and one day this week we will see them play in uniform. After they finished and we took pictures, we put our stuff in our rooms. I am staying in the dorm and two girls will stay with me to keep me company. Then we went to the place where the pastors and other two guys who came are staying, and were welcomed with yet another musical group -- the "Angel Four" I think. They have a lot of musical groups here. We drank coconut water from the coconut, an ate star apples.

Afterwards Ate Marlin showed me her cottage and around the dorm (I think it's not the only building for the girls, because it is quite small). Soon we will have supper, and then later will be vespers, presented by Pastor Jorge.

Now I am resting on my bed with all my dead gadgets charging, thinking about the coming week. It is really exciting to be here. I didn't realize it would be such an adventure too! More in the wilderness than I expected. But more than that, it has been good to meet the people here, even though only briefly so far. I believe it will help me more now as I further prepare for the week of prayer. It's given me a feel for the kids, their life, their worldview, and an ever growing desire to share with them what I have learned and experienced. Along with that comes a familiar feeling of inadequacy (not to mention how blessed I am), accompanied with peace, knowing that God still uses broken vessels, and He is my Sufficiency. The harvest is great, the laborers few, but I say, "Here I am, Lord, send Me."

And He has.

And He is with me.

The Next 22.5 Weeks: Part 2

"How is the Philippines?"
"Good."
"..."

Well, here is the post you have all been waiting for. Everyone has been asking, and I've been saying "good" for too long now. Here is my real answer; are you ready for this?

*deep breath*

Hot, humid, green, busy, pollution, traffic, jeepnies, flip-flops, Tagalog, family, sunshine, poor, rich, cement houses, food, Catholic, tricycles, canteens (little cafeteria shops), ethnic, Asian, billboards and signs all over (with everyone and their grandma's picture on everything they can get it on), dirty, palm-trees, mountains, loud, music (getting so tired of "Gangnam Style" wherever I go), cellphones, food (did I say that already?), sweet food, salty food, snacks, cheap spas, cheap massages, cheap everything, fruit (sorry, that's food too), mangoes, lack of toilet paper, dirty bathrooms, dogs in cages, "ma'am/sir" echoing from all sides, mangoes.

Yes, I like mangoes.
Especially the Philippine mango, fresh and cheap, every. single. day.
Oh, and rice. Better not forget that.

Can't, really.

But you know what? Some of the above may seem a bit foreign and annoying (no doubt it is) but that almost comprehensive, descriptive list is more than just a list. It's more than just my experience so far, and it's more than what life is for the next 22 weeks.

What makes that list is carving itself into my heart.

What makes that list?

People
in a beautiful place
called the Philippines.

Yes, it is beautiful. In spite of the run down tricycles, the lack of garbage cans (that should have been in the list), the crowded streets and malls and everywhere, the poor houses (shacks), the messy everything...

It's beautiful. Not those things in and of themselves. But those things represent real people and real lives and real souls.

Even I am not sure how the Philippines could be growing in my heart in spite of the foreignness (I didn't know that was a word) and inconvenience of being a North American SDA young woman who looks like and is a Filipina but can't speak Filipino in the Philippines.

But it is. Why?

God wants me here.

Anywhere is beautiful if it's where God wants you to be.

I pray that...

whenever I feel like I don't want to be here,
.........I will remember that God wants me to be here.

whenever I feel small and inexperienced,
.........I will remember that God is big and infinitely experienced (understatement).

whenever I feel tired,
.........I will remember that God "never slumbers."

whenever I make a mistake,
.........I will remember that all things work together for good, for them who love God...

...and who are the called according to His purpose.

So then, what is His purpose for me? That, my friends, is answered on a moment by moment basis (other than the grand, overarching purpose of reconciling the world to God, who is Love, by lifting up the cross).

But, what it looks like might be His purpose for me is something like this. If you'd like more details, don't hesitate to ask.

1. Be a positive influence, encouragement, and help in my family, in many ways. (My lola [great-grandma] lives with us, and my grandma is battling cancer).
2. Be involved at my grandparents' school teaching violin etc.
3. Be involved with an Adventist family whose kids play violin, in their music and health evangelism ministries.
4. Orchestrate music part time for Fountainview Academy.
5. Go on a mission trip with my home church (from Canada) to the mountains of the Philippines.
6. Be involved with the local church and boarding school.
7. Continue reading and studying and memorizing and utilizing what I learned at ARISE.

All in all, I am just waiting to see how God leads each day, so that He can use me to be a blessing in whatever I do. I've been getting over a cold for about a week now, so since my parents left last week, not too much has happened yet. But now, life is about to get rolling...

Dear Father in Heaven,

Help me to remember that these people in this place called the Philippines are beautiful. They are beautiful to You; let them never cease to be beautiful to me. Help me help them. Reveal to them greater and deeper pictures of Your character and love through me. I am a weak and small vessel, but You are strong and great. The vessel is right-side up: please fill me, for You promised. Fill me with Your Spirit and with Your love. Let the next 22 weeks (and beyond) be fully and entirely Yours.

In Jesus' precious name,

Amen.

The Next 22.5 Weeks: Part 1

I'm all moved in.

The Sabbath is but less than an hour old. In the quiet, I find the perfect opportunity to review my experiences from the last two weeks.

And anticipate the next 22.5.

This morning, my parents drove off to Manila at 9:00. That marked the beginning of the next 5 months of my life.

To be perfectly honest, I was scared.
And homesick.
And, of course, sad.

Some of that lingers still. But I knew the only unchanging, reliable source of peace and strength -- really, everything I need -- was God and His word. I praise Him for His unfailing love in speaking to me personally as I searched His word for comfort and direction.

I'm not alone.

Even though I lack the fellowship of like-minded young people and my immediate family, and I find my self in the midst of a new culture with different family and friends -- guess what overrides?

Love. God's love, that is.

God's love for me, and His fully satisfying care and presence.
God's love for others, which I pray will continually grow in my heart.

(I'm growing to love the depths of that word more and more. Pun intended.)

"Let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross..." Heb 12:2

To be continued...

Arrival

23.5˚C, the voice over the intercom said. Nice, cool December weather—not bad, except for the fact that it was only 6 o'clock in the morning. Upon disembarking the plane, a strange but familiar smell greeted me. Yep, this is the Philippines, alright. We walked quickly with the eager hordes of people to immigration. Surprisingly, the entire process (immigration, baggage claim, and customs) didn't take near as long as we anticipated. Soon we were on our way out, wheeling our carts through the masses, to meet my grandpa and his driver outside.

Some guys helped us load our suitcases into the van and hung around for a tip. I think they were disappointed though—we didn't give them much (they didn't do much) but they probably expected more from foreigners.

As we drove through the streets of Manila, I watched the scenery flow by. Jeepnies. Shacks. Lots of billboards everywhere. Crazy driving. Dirty buildings. Outside the city, it was much prettier, with many palm trees and much greenery. Sort of like Hawaii. After way too many toll booths, we finally made it to Lipa City, where my grandparents live. Even crazier driving. Lots of people. By the way, pedestrians do not have the right of way here. Run-down businesses and huge grand malls, rich and poor living on the same street—the Philippines is full of polar opposites.

Since I was here just over 5 years ago, it's not exactly culture shock, but I guess I forgot exactly how different things are here. There are things here that you wouldn't even imagine seeing in North America. We are so blessed to be some of the most wealthy and healthy people in the world, and we don't even realize it.

We arrived yesterday, on Thursday morning. I will post more later. I think that we are having a family reunion tomorrow afternoon, so I'll have more to write about.

Happy Sabbath everyone!

(This was shot quickly with my iPod while driving through town today)